What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
Randomize
