You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Randomize
