We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
just got waxed at a place I havent been to in a while
woman didnt remember me then in the middle of waxing she announced that she just didnt recognize my face
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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