OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
i told him he had the best dick i've ever seen. then supposedly i kept repeating "peter piper picked the perfect penis"
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Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
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I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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