I'm drive I can fine osifer
Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Randomize