Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
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