Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
