i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
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