no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
You brought us all personal gifts you had stolen from the party and bellowed "hoes hoes hoes, clepto Santa loves you"
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Randomize
