Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
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