He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
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how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
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And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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