Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
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