i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Randomize
