Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
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