bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Either I'm drunk or judge Judy has 3D commercials...so I think I'm drunk. Also I may or may not haven eaten a hoagie on the toilet when I didn't want to stand up
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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