What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Randomize
