I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
Randomize
