im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize