he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark.
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Randomize
