What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I should be sponsored by Trojan
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I love you. Go after that dick
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
