Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
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