that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I just got St Patricks day and the day after St Patricks day off, wich I'm pretty sure is as close to a raise as I'll ever get.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize
