So drunk its hurt
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
it was like eating out sand paper
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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