Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
He walked into the bar, took a deep sniff and said "this place is fertile and ready for my seed" then calmly walked to the service area
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
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