if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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