God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
