Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
You know your night is done when the police confiscate your bra at high school basketball game
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
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