is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Randomize
