oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
You just said you hate yourself then sent me a picture of your friend's penis. Clearly this is a night of honesty.
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
