Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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