@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
soo... how was my night?
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