Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
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