You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I JUST SAW MY THERAPIST OUTSIDE OF WORK AND I DONT KNOW THE ADULT THING TO DO
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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