you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
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