But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
So I was bartending last night and this guy w/ his gf said that he recognized me, so I asked him, "do you watch a lot of gay porn?"
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
