its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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