I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize