you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
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