I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
So I walk in and he's teaching someone in London via Skype how to roll a blunt. I have new found respect for him.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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