I got chris browned last night
Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
