I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
Randomize