it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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