Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
