3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
She's JV to your varsity
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
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