was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
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