Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
You're finding a boat, I'm going to sleep with a guy that lives above a bar and has 24 hour access. We are really nailing this adulting thing
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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