I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Randomize
