I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
