I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
Randomize
