hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
Barsexuality is the new black.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
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